About Me
Fun Facts about Van Walton
My favorite smell: The way the earth smells after it rains.
My favorite sound: The first notes of a grand symphony.
My favorite way to relax: Sitting anywhere outside - on my front porch, on my deck, or by the lake, early in the morning with my first cup of coffee.
My favorite birthday dessert: a Peach cobbler baked by my husband. He’s my fave chef!
I will not eat: Avocado. They turn my stomach into a volcano that never erupts.
Technology I couldn't live without and why: My laptop - it takes me anywhere I want to go.
One thing that makes me smile: My sons' faces!
Friend Van on FacebookMy Resources
My book, From the Pound to the Palace, is available for $10
from Proverbs 31 Ministries.
My book, Little Halos, is available for $5.99 from Proverbs
31 Ministries.
Proverbs 31 Ministries
Links
Showing posts with label cloudy weather. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cloudy weather. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
TODAY'S WEATHER REPORT
Mostly cloudy.Why do weather reports predicting overcast skies bring on the blues?
I can’t answer that question, but I know that clouds have been given a bum rap and I don’t know why.
I’m here to tell you today about the positive influence of clouds, not the ones we see in the sky but the emotional ones that roll in, uninvited.
The dreary days in my life have been defined by broken relationships, illness, feelings of worthlessness, unemployment, and failed attempts to succeed at many given opportunities.
Unfortunately for me the clouds that appear most often in my life overlap my role as a mother:
Clouds have rolled in over the horizon of my days in the forms of:
my sons’ ~
-broken hearts that I can’t mend
-failure that I can’t fix
-unmet expectations that I can’t change
-grief that I can’t erase
-illness that I can’t heal
my own ~
-frustration that consumes me
-impatience that possesses me
-misunderstandings that grieve me
-disappointment that saddens me
-opportunities that evade me
Whew – that is a dreary forecast.
Thank God clouds serve another purpose. I know because I have experienced overcast days that turned out to be glorious. Had it not been for the “clouds” in my life, I wouldn’t be the growing-more-confident-day-by-day woman that God is allowing me to become.
Let me tell you one of my cloudy-day-turned-glorious stories. I hope it touches your heart like it does mine each time I remember it.
“Oh, God,” I sobbed. “I’m a terrible mother! I’ll never be the perfect parent I dreamed of being.”
I cried these words into the couch cushion early one morning after dropping off my sons at school.
The morning had a bad start. Neither boy wanted to cooperate and, to add challenge to the day, we needed to leave earlier than normal. On snowy days our plans always changed.
I drove a different route to school due to dangerous road conditions. Of course this alternate schedule added minutes to travel time.But, nobody seemed to care about my cautious need to protect, so no one hurried. It seemed I waited patiently forever before they both tumbled into the car dragging their gear behind them.
That’s when I let them have it. I lost all dignity and blasted them. It might have been 10 degrees below outside with snow blowing off roof tops, but the blizzard of scolding words and sharp jabs is what froze my sons’ hearts that day. When I finished, each head hung from drooped shoulders. We drove in silence to school. At the drop-off curb the van’s door slid open and dejected boys slithered away like retreating worms. No hugs, no kisses, no encouraging words to get them through the day. I had given them bottom-of-the-food-chain treatment. Now they were living up to my assessment.How’s that for a positive way to start the school day? Not very conducive to learning, I have to admit.
Driving home the “I love you” that I never spoke over my children hung in the icy space that surrounded me, devouring all my thoughts, destroying my plans for the day, and deeply disturbing my emotions.I couldn’t get home fast enough. To curl up and fall asleep became my goal. Exhausted and shivering, I wished myself into my escape world – sleep. Sobbing my confession to the cushion and then to God, I drew in a long breath and sighed. I remember my last words. “God, I am not good enough to parent these boys. I will never be a perfect parent.”
I slept…
The warm sun shining on my face begged me to wake up. Instead, I chose to drift and float in a hammock of warm rays that surrounded my body. A content smile crept up both cheeks as I ignored the gentle call.
In that state I remembered what had put me to sleep so I prayed:
“God? I’ve tried so hard to do all the right things with my children. Today I really failed. I’m not a perfect parent. I am so sorry.”
The room stilled; sun rays filled every corner. As I lay there in a sanctuary of sorts, God spoke. I didn’t hear an audible voice, but I can tell you, He spoke compassionate words of forgiveness and acceptance. 
“I didn’t call you to be a perfect parent. That is not required. You’ve had near perfect parents and look at you. Has it made a difference in your life? ”“Yes I have near perfect parents, yet I rebelled. I also have a perfect Father and I still disobey!”
Oh, God, You are right. Perfection is not the key to parenting. Thank you for letting me off the hook.”
Then slowly, God taught me how to parent.
He allowed me to see the error of my tactics. Gently, compassionately, quietly he simply reminded me. No blasting words. No scolding or cutting comments.
That was it; it was over. My Father excused me! He put my past behind! He soothed me and encouraged me to take a different course the next time.
He taught me lessons I needed to learn.That afternoon when I had my sons to myself, I reminded them of our morning. I apologized for my behavior and told them I had talked with God.
“I don’t know what you learned in school today, but this morning God used you to teach me how to be a better parent. I believe God gave you to me so I could learn how to be more like Him.”
Thank you Father. Help me to be a parent like You.
Parenting is a real challenge, but it is not so daunting a task that we should despair. We are in this together and at Proverbs 31 Ministries we want to encourage you with many resources for this calling.
My friend, Renee Swope, and fellow speaker invited me to share other stories about parenting. So I sent her a few real life stories about teaching spiritual truths to our children through everyday life moments in the same way God taught me! If you would like to read those ideas go on over and read about them on her Month of Encouragement for Moms blog and find out about a chance to win our joint giveaway, a copy of a DVD she and I, along with her two sons, produced.
Meanwhile, today I am giving away a copy of the book I wrote, From the Pound to the Palace.
Just drop me a little note in the comment box telling me about your children, their names, and how much you love them. I will draw from the comments, my doggie will sign our book for your child, and we will send it to you! FYI I can't contact you if you are an anonymous contributor so I will announce on Saturday who the winner is. Come back and find out!
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