These words were the marching orders God gave me one day when despair threatened to "take me down." Today - thirty - yes! thirty years later I continue to live by 2 Corinthians 1:3-7:

The God of All Comfort: Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God...

I had no idea when, at the ripe age of 27, Jesus stepped into my space and spoke to me, encouraging me in the midst of my hopelessness, telling me that I would REALLY use my circumstances to comfort others.

As many of you read - I have shed a few tears lately, tears of grief for the family who lost their son and the young adults who lost their friend. I am slowly recovering this week from the went-back-to-college syndrome. My house seems so empty - my heart and life also.

BUT - the work I do, in Jesus' Name, does not come back void. It returns many fold. When you finish reading this post you will stand amazed at God's compassion and sweetness. I read these verses in my Bible this morning:

Luke 6:38 "Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."

I have a passionate relationship with the Latina community in Charlotte. I want to give to them what women's ministries has given to me over the years. I am so blessed to have been allowed to be the director of Hispanic Ministries for Proverbs 31 Mnistires (www.proverbios31.org.) I am also blessed to have met many dedicated sisters who share the same vision. This morning Judith left this comment on my blog. She wrote it in Spanish (as you can see.) I have translated it.

Mientras tus hijos, continuan sin ti. Dios te ha puesto hijas como nosotras para que continues haciendo tu trabajo. Te queremos."

While your sons have moved on, God has placed daughters like myself in your life so you might continue your work. We love you!

"...a good measure, presed down, shaken together and running over..."

If this doesn't spur me to press on, what will!

Gracias, Judith (thank you Judith) Now you have comforted me with the comfort which He has shown to you.

(gotta shovel through my life before the book review - but there is a connection)

I have taken a week off from blogging. First week in January I dealt with the death of my son's classmate - not a natural death. (read the previous blog) Then I had to deal with my son's return to college after having him home for nearly a month. I did not want him to go back!! I still don't want him gone! I love having him around. He is such a great kid. As he made noise about returning I hid my head in the sand. Then under my very nose I watched from my office as he went back in front, up and down the stairs, like a giant ant, with arms full of duffle bags and laundry baskets (he packs in laundry baskets that way he doesn't have to transfer clothes to drawers- pretty smart). I sat with my computer in my lap, surrounded by books - in denial. Is he really going back to school? Then he slowly entered the room. "Well, mom. It was a great Christmas. I had fun. Thanks for making it special." He looked down at his feet, held out his arms, and shuffled toward me. "I guess, ummmm, bye."

Oh how I tried to be a beautiful and dignified composed mother. It did not work! I stood up and told him I would walk him to the car. I tried really hard to keep the tears at bay. "Down. Back" I kept commanding. The tears didn't hear. They wanted to explode. "Oh no! " I whispered to myself as I followed him down the stairs. Being surrounded by boys, I know how they hate tears and emotion.

He stepped into the family room to tell his dad good-bye. They hugged, shook hands, and that was it! How can that be. No emotion. "Have a good semester. See ya." His dad was turning around already. Life goes on...

Benjamin stepped down into the garage. I put my hand on his shoulder. I asked if I could pray for him. "Sure mom."

I prayed through the tears. I had to stop a few times, get my breath, fight sobs... oh well maybe he will have a little patience with his future wife when she cries. He was patient with me. "...Father, please don't ever let him forget how much we love him. Carry him through the next few months. Be his daddy. We are not there for him. We trust You to watch over him in Jesus' Name, Amen." I squeezed his great big shoulders.

"Thanks Mom. I love you." He was off.........

I went upstairs to my office and sobbed!

OK on to the book review: Another book I listened to...

( I highly recommend checking out books on CD when your family travels. It is a great way to pass the time and bring the family together for good conversation when you stop at the road side picnic area or sit in Chic fil A or Arbys on your way to Disney or sports' tournaments or grandmother's.)

was A QUIET STRENGTH by Tony Dungy. What I found amazing over my Christmas break was that I listened to his story which included the sad sad tale of his 19 year old son who took his own life during the holidays a couple of years ago. My younger son is 19 and his friend who died two weeks ago (took his own life - read previous post) was also 19. It is scary for parents these days. Parenting NEVER comes to an end! We can never stop praying for our children.

I grew to admire Coach Dungy - even though I am not much of a sports fan ( I know. I have boys and they are LOVERS of sports. I guess I am too cynical about sports and all the hype.) I appreciate the fact that he is a committed Christian and is not ashamed, nor is he afraid to stand up for his faith. We need more Christian men in leadership. He is also a family man and a strong husband who leads by example. I enjoyed his stories about coaches' children on the playing field, in the offices, and on trips. Our children need to be with their parents. They don't have many positive role models. I appreciate that this man makes the point - include the children.

If you check out his web site you can hear why he wrote the book - quiet strength is what it takes to get through life's trials. It is the strength we get from God, from the inside where He dwells - the strength that builds our character.

Mr. Dungy, thank you for your testimony. It gives me hope to know that you are leading young men toward a purposeful future. May God continue to give you strength and may your strength motivate the young men in your circle of influence to make good decisions and pave the way for the next generation.

I pray my Benjamin find a mentor like you, a godly man on his college campus, someone with quiet strength and dignity who will motivate my child to focus on the eternal and not the temporal.

God bless you, Coach Dungy

GOD RESCUES HIS OWN

I am taking a break from book reviews to write about a life review.
This morning I woke up dreading what I would have to do today. This would not be a "life in the garden" day. For the past week I have been reminded, once again, that "it's a jungle" out there. Try as hard as I might, I cannot avoid it!

The only thing on my calendar for the day was "Memorial Service for Joe." Joe, my son's classmate, who graduated a year later than Benjamin, took his life less than a week ago. Everyone remotely related to this family has walked around these past few days - stunned.

How does someting like this happen? Could it have been prevented? How is the family coping? Is there anything anyone can do to make this awful thing go away?

I personally do not know the family. I attended the service because it was held at my church. Our pastor told the family, when he made his opening statements, that the people in attendance were there to be Jesus' hands, feets, arms, shoulders, and heart reaching out. That is exactly why I went. I wanted to support the grieving family. I wanted to sit with my son. I wanted to pray that Joe's death would be used by God for the good.

During the service I, like most everyone there, cried, grieved, mourned, listened trying to make sense of it all, and even laughed. Throughout the two hours that several hundred people celebrated Joe's life, Peace and Hope visited the place in my heart that had opened up to despair when death came to visit our community.

In the midst of the memorial, God revealed to me that He has the power to use the worst in life- turning ashes into beauty. Today I was reminded once again: Our young people are amazingly beautiful. Even though they face incredible odds, they are overcoming. What do I mean?

- They packed the sanctuary as they came to pay their respect to a suffering family, a mother and daddy, a brother and sister, a grandmother and aunt and many other suffering extreme loss and pain. Young men wept openly while they remembered their friend. For two hours young ladies sat and listened while friends and teachers spoke fondly.

- Four of Joe's best friends stood in the midst of their grief and shared eloquently. These were guys who party with my son, funloving kids who seem to carelessly make their way through life. Yet their words and thoughts struck deep. Their compassion laid a foundation for healing to begin. Their strength gave hope. Their vulnerability poured warmth and good will into the hearts of all who attended.

- Young musicians selflessly shared their amazing voices and piano playing talents as they lead us to praise God and celebrate life.

Then a daddy spoke about the death of his son. He could have sat alone in his grief. He certainly deserved to do so. He could have mourned in his closet. I would have. He could have turned away from the inquisitive faces of bewildered teens, but he offered to shed some meaning on his loss. He told us God had assured him that Joe had not been abandoned in his moment of confusion. "I will never forsake you or abandon you," our Father promises.

The sun is setting on this difficult day. Darkness could settle in. Instead the joy of the Lord reigns. I have been convinced once again that nothing can separate me or mine from the love of God. He has made His plan clear. If we, through faith, accept His gift of grace, eternal life is ours. Joe knew that. His dad told the stories that confirmed Joe's trust in Jesus. Nothing can separate us from God's love - not even a mistaken choice that takes a life.

Be encouraged, today in Charlotte, NC in an ordinary sanctuary the body of Christ united and celebrated life in the midst of death.

I want to remind you - life within the Body is worth rejoicing. While the world has its struggles, we who are Christians have the power to overcome, together.

A mighty fortress is our God...

Did we in our own strength confide, our striving would be losing;
Were not the right Man on our side, the Man of God’s own choosing: Dost ask who that may be? Christ Jesus, it is He; Lord Sabaoth, His Name, from age to age the same, And He must win the battle.

Praise You God, Joe is in your arms. You are the God of all comfort. I pray, please continue to comfort the Carrera family.

Thank you Carrara family for inviting us to share with you the presence of Almighty God.

I have begun the new year hopelessly caught up in the lives of three people I met during the last two weeks. None of these people knows me. I know them because I read, or listened to, the books they wrote. It seems that each step I take, each decision I make, each conversation I have somehow returns to one of the three books I read. If you can't tell, each book impacted my life.

And what about these books has intrigued me? Two books were biographies of famous men. As I listened to their stories my admiration grew for each one. I learned about American politics, life in Washington DC, the judicial system, and survival. I also learned a lot about football, perseverance, painful struggles, the mistakes humans make, the grace needed to overcome, success, and failure. The third book was the story of a dog. I caught a glimpse of devotion, unconditional love, heart break, hard work, desperation, life, and death. WOW. I feel so well rounded, so exposed, so worldly. I don't mean to sound uppity or arrogant. I just wish to encourage you to read more this year. I had the privilege of being exposed to three books and I learned so much. I hope to live my life differently as a result of having read/listened to each author's tale.

What I find interesting is that the three books about a coach, a judge, and a dog shared a common thread. Each was rescued in one way or another from life's hard knocks.

What follows is three reviews- probably not all written today, though.

RESCUING SPRITE by Mark Levin was my sister's Christmas gift to me. Along with the book she gave me a box of the most delicious tea I have ever sipped. What a great gift, a book and tea. Talk about relaxing and inspiring. Watch out girlfriends. I may be gifting you with a book, a blanket, and a bit of tea for your birthday this year. My sister and I grew up with dogs - oh by the way the Sprite in the book was a dog. Mark tells the story of how his family rescued Sprite and how the wonderful dog changed the lives of the Levin family. I could relate - big time. I have a dog - Air. My son and I rescued him. Our little dog also changed our lives - mine especially. From the moment I stepped into the animal shelter and saw the sad faces of those helpless little animals until an epiphany I had years later, our rescued dog planted a seed of spiritual transformation in my life, a seed that has grown and bloomed, a seed that has given me purpose and dignity in life. In fact, like Mark, I too wrote a book about my dog, FROM THE POUND TO THE PALACE. Many of you have read it and gifted it the children in your lives. I so appreciate your kind comments and your support. Unlike Mark, my book was written for children. Each book, though has the power to change lives. RESCUING SPRITE is a warm story about a united family - we so need happy, united families these days. The family agrees to take in a lost dog, give him a home, and shower him with love treating him with respect and dignity. In return the dog filled the lives of the Levin family with joy, warmth, laughter, and purpose. Part of the proceeds of Mark's book goes to help rescue helpless animals. His heart is so open to aiding abandoned, lost, and abused dogs one can't help but want to run, not walk, to the nearest animal shelter to bring home a pet for each member of the family. What a way to teach responsibiltiy and compassion to our children. Anyway, my heart was made bigger for having read RESCUING SPRITE. Not only do I want to love my little dog better, but I want to reach out to all God's creation - especially men and women, to dignify them with respect and honor - something else society so needs and longs for. Get the book and make it a family read. It will change the way you do family in your home.

That's it. If you are at all interested in the other books I read, just come back for another visit. Bring your tea!